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Funny Engagement Wishes

Funny Engagement Wishes – Ben Walker

So, your friend is engaged. You’ve thought through everything to write to them. You need to be unique, interesting, and stand out from everyone else! A simple “congratulations” simply won’t do, you’ve known them long enough to know that.

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“Congratulations” goes without saying, so what can you do to stand out? You’ve tried everything out, thought through it all. The best thing to be is funny. Depending on your relationship with who is engaged will affect how far you can go. But worry not! We have some funny ideas to get the ball rolling!

For Friends

Congratulations on finding someone as strange as you!
I never expected this to happen! Congratulations on your engagement!
I’m not jealous, honest! Seriously, though, congratulations on getting engaged!
When’s the bachelor/ bachelorette party? I’ll be sensible. Promise.
Can I be honest? I never expected this in college! Congratulations on your engagement!
When you told us you were seeing someone we thought you were joking. Now you’re engaged, congratulations!
I’m impressed that you found someone, and I’m impressed that they’re patient enough to be with you! Congratulations on your engagement!

For Best Friends

My deepest condolences to your fiancé(e).
I can’t believe you found someone that can stand you for more than an hour at a time! Congratulations!
Just remember I still exist. I’m just saying.
I’m glad we didn’t have to marry when we turned thirty. Truthfully, I can’t stand you! Congratulations on your engagement!
Ok, but… I’m the best man, right?
I hope you haven’t told them too much. Congratulations on your engagement!
Wow. Honestly, this whole time I thought they were imaginary. Congratulations on your engagement!
You know when you forget someone’s name and it’s been too long and so now it’s awkward to ask? What’s yours again? Send [fiancé(e)’s name] my love!
So that girl/boy you always took to weddings as your plus one actually was your girl/boyfriend. Congratulations on your engagement!
To you I can say: “Congratulations!” And to your fiancé(e): “Congratulations?”
So. You proposed before they realised they were making a mistake. Smart play! Congratulations on your engagement!

For Sisters

Ever since you were young, we thought you’d be single forever. Congratulations on your engagement!
Dear Sister, congratulations on turning out ok in the end!
I don’t know how you managed to find such a good person with our upbringing!
I’ll admit, you were always the smartest. Congratulations on your engagement!
I have pictures. You know the ones. Leave a bag of money at my doorstep by 6:30am. But seriously, congratulations on your engagement!
Dad told me I had to tell you congratulations. Congratulations!
Well done, you won the bet. I owe you a fiver.

For Brothers

Mum says do the washing up when you’re home. Congratulations on your engagement!
I hope your fiancé(e) has thought long and hard about this decision. Congratulations anyway!
I never thought anyone with a sense of smell would go near you, and yet, here we are. Congratulations on your engagement, bro!
Remember the time we… And now look at you! Who would’ve thought you’d find someone! Congratulations on your engagement!
Our Parents are so proud. I’m so proud. We’re all so happy for you and I know you’ll be happy for the time ahead. P.S. You’re adopted.
Congratulations! Pass this card to your fiancé(e) a moment, please? You don’t need to do this. You’re allowed to say “no”. Now laugh and burn this card. Tell him I said something sweet.
I saw Dad handing Mum some money so I’m pretty sure they’d betted on us. Anyway, congratulations on your engagement!
Does that mean sooner or later I might be the cool aunt/uncle? Don’t worry I’ll make sure your kids don’t have too much fun! Be prepared that they love me more, though. Congratulations on your engagement!
I’m so happy that you’ve found someone else to annoy! Congratulations!

For Parents

Can I borrow some money, please? Oh yeah, and congratulations on your engagement!
I’m so proud of you. Ever since I was born I watched you become the person you are today. And now you’re getting married! They grow up so fast! Congratulations on your engagement.
You’ve raised me to be the person I am today. I’m so proud of you for that! Congratulations on your engagement! I hope you’re sensible on the bachelor/bachelorette/stag/hen night!
You’re wedding is catered, right? You’re not cooking? OK, I’ll be there. Congratulations on your engagement!
Congratulations on your engagement! Don’t try to keep up with my drinking at the wedding.

For Other Family Members

You’re part of this family and you’re still getting engaged? Well, a thousand times congratulations!
Somebody new is joining our family. Are they aware of what that means? Congratulations and good luck!
I’ve known you my whole life. Now I have someone else to get to know for years to come. They’re so lucky because of this simple fact! Congratulations on your engagement!
I’m so happy to welcome one more into our pack! Aren’t you glad you have such a normal, functional family to bring them into? Congratulations for getting engaged!


You’re now engaged. I should be phased, but by the amount you’ve aged… Wait, is this wedding staged!?
It’s your engagement! Honestly, I’m filled with amazement. It’s about time. Congratulations on your arrangement!
You met someone! Your life is so filled with fun! There’s so much you’ve done. But be careful, the race is nowhere near done. (Wedding planners can be difficult, so best of luck!) Congratulations on your engagement!
Your life is almost complete. What an amazing feat! And no, I can’t compete. Good luck for you and your gorgeous fiancé(e).
We thought they weren’t real, so I’m glad you’ve managed to seal the deal!
You’ve left me grinning. My head is spinning. What a life you’re winning! But careful, this is just the beginning.
This is great. Ever since the first date, honestly, it was fate. But one second, wait. Who is your best mate?